We can't call a man a father if he does not do the
housework. Have you ever heard this catch phrase? Today, the
number of working women is increasing, and the quality and
breadth of jobs which women hold are gradually improving. And
many social groups say that fathers should do housework.
Housework is no longer only women's role. I think that idea
is good for the family, because if only mothers do households,
that would be big burden for them. The opinion that father's
role is only breadwinner is out-of -date. Because society's
opinion is changing, many Japanese fathers think they should do
housework. Yet then, they find that they have little skill to do
it. And fathers have not found that they must obtain skills to do
housework for both themselves and his family. Because if
something happens to his wife, he must do household by
himself.
The Japanese old social idea is that men are only
breadwinners, and men should not do the housework. This idea
influenced the education system in Japan. If we were in our
father's generation, we would have had no time to study how
to cook and how to washing clothes and dishes like we studied in
junior high school. Old Japanese idea also said that women should
do only housework. And the parents never allow their daughter to
go to university in that time. Because as I wrote before, old
Japanese idea said that women didn't need any knowledge of
studies but need skills of housework. This is why older Japanese
men cannot learn how to housework do. And the other reason is
family cannot afford to allow all of their children to go to
college at that time. Only child they can make go to university
is their oldest son. This economic situation leads to the idea
that the men are only breadwinner in the family. But through the
high growth of economy, Japan has become one of the richest
countries in the world. And parents can afford their daughter to
go to university. Then the number of women who graduated college
is increasing. And it is also increasing that the number of women
who work outside of the home. This event changes the Japanese old
idea that fathers are only breadwinner. And this change raise the
new idea that fathers had better help their wives to do
housework.
And I will show you the other reason that Japanese fathers
don't do households. We know Japanese work very hard, and it
is natural for them to do overtime working and to work on Sunday.
This is the other reason that Japanese fathers can't help
their wife, because many of them would say I'm too busy to
help housework, when they were asked to do it. But now Japan is
in great depression, some people are fired and the companies
don't want employees to work overtime. This depression gives
Japanese fathers the time to do housework. They finally noticed
that they have no idea and no skills to do it. Japanese old
social idea causes this problem. So there is no problem that our
father doesn't know how to help the housework. But is it
reasonable for fathers not to help their wives only because they
have no skills to do that? If fathers have not learned to cook,
they should learn how to cook. If fathers have not learned how to
wash the clothes, they should learn how to wash the clothes. I
heard that there are many Komin-kan, community education centers,
for men in Japan. I suggested that Japanese fathers who avoid
housework only because they don't have skills, how about go
to there to obtain those skills?
Certainly now, Japanese fathers may have no skills, but they
are given the chance to get them because of depression and there
are many supporting groups to get those skills. And I want to
make fathers realized that they must obtain the housework skills
for both himself and his family. When a mother becomes unable to
do the housework for some reason, for example, she become
hospitalize, who is going to do the housework? Who is going to
take care of the children? This is the father's job. In this
situation fathers cannot say that they do not know how to cook.
So fathers should obtain and practice the housework skills in his
daily life. Let's start thinking what you can do to obtain
the skills of housework.
by Masaaki Itakura
References
Kosodate sinai to chichioya to iwanai? [If you don't raise
your kids, you're not a father?]. (1999, May 22). Asahi
Shimbun, p.17.
Yamaguchi, M. (1998, October 27). Man's kitchen not (yet)
his casle. The Japan Times, p.3.
Inside the Family Department. Available: http://www4.parentsplace.com/ [1999, Dec 8]
